Fiction_L Archives library humor Dates: 1/24/00,7:22 PM  through  2/5/00,10:43 AM  (81 postings) Search for: Select one or more indexes to search: 2011-current     2009-2010     2004-2008    1995-2003    (Matches from each index will be displayed separately in the results page.) Return to January 2000 thread menu   |   Fiction_L Archives Menu

FROM: "Pamela M Weinberg" <[removed]@chipublib.org>
REC'D: 1/24/00, 7:22 PM

For a national library week program I am planning, I would like to do
something with library humor, i.e. the actual funny things that happen to
you because you work at a library. I would love it if you think of funny
incidents, stories, patrons, malaprops,etc. and send them to me. You know
what I'm talking about - the stories you come home and tell your family or
the ones to regale your friends with. I'll also take poignant or
endearing (especially good for children's experiences) stories that you as
a staff member have experienced. I have some books and will get things
from journals, but I need first-hand funny stories.

I can't promise that I can put these on fictionL, but I might have hand-
outs from the program that I could send if you give me your names. I'm
really anxious to hear from you.

Thanks -

Pam Weinberg
Oriole Park Br
Chicago Public Library

xx
x~x
`

FROM: "Marsha Valance " <[removed]@mpl.org>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 7:57 AM

In the 1980s, I administered a public library in Grand Rapis, Minnesota, a town of 6000 on the edge of the Iron Range, 160 miles due north of the Twin Cities, 85 miles NW of Duluth. One morning, about 20 minutes before the library opened for business, I heard a noise at the door, and looked up to see a bear cub pawing at the door to come in. Other staff & I were dumfounded, and just stared for a few minutes. Then I phoned the city animal control officer, who showed up and chased the bearcub around the parking lot in his little yellow truck before lassoing him. The cub was let free in the woods outside of town--we all hoped to hook up with his mother.

Also, in 1968, when I was working in the Central Children's Room of the New York Public Library, wec were told to keep an eye out for someone urinating in the poetry corner. We discovered it was an 8-year-old boy from South America, who couldn't speak enough English to ask for the lavatory. With the help of a bilingual dictionary, we communicated enough to show him.

HTH,


Marsha J. Valance
Regional Librarian
Wisconsin Regional Library f/t Blind & Physically Handicapped
813 West Wells Street
Milwaukee, Wi 53233-1436
Phone: 414/286-3010
FAX: 414/286-3102
Email: <[removed]@mpl.org>

"That All May Read"

>>> Pamela M Weinberg <[removed]@chipublib.org> 01/24 7:21 PM >>>

For a national library week program I am planning, I would like to do
something with library humor, i.e. the actual funny things that happen to
you because you work at a library. I would love it if you think of funny
incidents, stories, patrons, malaprops,etc. and send them to me. You know
what I'm talking about - the stories you come home and tell your family or
the ones to regale your friends with. I'll also take poignant or
endearing (especially good for children's experiences) stories that you as
a staff member have experienced. I have some books and will get things
from journals, but I need first-hand funny stories.

I can't promise that I can put these on fictionL, but I might have hand-
outs from the program that I could send if you give me your names. I'm
really anxious to hear from you.

Thanks -

Pam Weinberg
Oriole Park Br
Chicago Public Library

xx
x~x
`

FROM: "Viccy Kemp" <[removed]@ci.carrollton.tx.us>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 8:39 AM

True story: In a previous life, I ran a bookstore for a large chain for ten
years. You would be amazed at the malapropisms that come along (or maybe
not!). My all time favorite was the student looking for "Tequila
Mockingbird." It was all I could do to not fall down on the floor laughing.
And now, every time I help someone looking for "To Kill a Mockingbird" now,
I have to smile.
Viccy Kemp
The opinions are my own; the library wouldn't want 'em!

> -----Original Message-----
> From: Pamela M Weinberg [[removed]@chipublib.org]
> Sent: Monday, January 24, 2000 7:22 PM
> [removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org
> Subject: library humor
>
>
> For a national library week program I am planning, I would like to do
> something with library humor, i.e. the actual funny things that happen to
> you because you work at a library. I would love it if you think of funny
> incidents, stories, patrons, malaprops,etc. and send them to me. You know
> what I'm talking about - the stories you come home and tell your family or
> the ones to regale your friends with. I'll also take poignant or
> endearing (especially good for children's experiences) stories that you as
> a staff member have experienced. I have some books and will get things
> from journals, but I need first-hand funny stories.
>
> I can't promise that I can put these on fictionL, but I might have hand-
> outs from the program that I could send if you give me your names. I'm
> really anxious to hear from you.
>
> Thanks -
>
> Pam Weinberg
> Oriole Park Br
> Chicago Public Library
>
>
>
>
>
> xx
> x~x
> `

FROM: "Richards Free Library" <[removed]@sugar-river.net>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 8:50 AM

Pam: I would love a copy of your handout. I have to speak to the Ladies
Circle at the local church in March and that was the topic they selected.
Andrea Thorpe
At 07:21 PM 01/24/2000 -0600, you wrote:
>
>For a national library week program I am planning, I would like to do
>something with library humor, i.e. the actual funny things that happen to
>you because you work at a library. I would love it if you think of funny
>incidents, stories, patrons, malaprops,etc. and send them to me. You know
>what I'm talking about - the stories you come home and tell your family or
>the ones to regale your friends with. I'll also take poignant or
>endearing (especially good for children's experiences) stories that you as
>a staff member have experienced. I have some books and will get things
>from journals, but I need first-hand funny stories.
>
>I can't promise that I can put these on fictionL, but I might have hand-
>outs from the program that I could send if you give me your names. I'm
>really anxious to hear from you.
>
>Thanks -
>
>Pam Weinberg
>Oriole Park Br
>Chicago Public Library
>
>
>
>
>
>xx
>x~x
>`
>
>
>

**********************************************************************
Richards Free Library
58 N. Main Street
Newport, NH 03773
(603) 863-3430
(603) 863-3022 (fax)
e-mail: [removed]@sugar-river.net
<A HREF="http://www.sugar-river.net/~rfl">http://www.sugar-river.net/~rfl</A>

web site: <A HREF="http://www.sugar-river.net/~rfl">http://www.sugar-river.net/~rfl</A>

FROM: "Theresa Lukas" <[removed]@lfpl.org>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 8:58 AM

I would also like a handout of this program. Thanks! :-)

Theresa Lukas
Library Assistant
Southwest Regional Library
933-0029
[removed]@lfpl.org

-----Original Message-----
From: Pamela M Weinberg [[removed]@chipublib.org]
Sent: Monday, January 24, 2000 8:22 PM
[removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org
Subject: library humor


For a national library week program I am planning, I would
like to do
something with library humor, i.e. the actual funny things
that happen to
you because you work at a library. I would love it if you
think of funny
incidents, stories, patrons, malaprops,etc. and send them to
me. You know
what I'm talking about - the stories you come home and tell
your family or
the ones to regale your friends with. I'll also take
poignant or
endearing (especially good for children's experiences)
stories that you as
a staff member have experienced. I have some books and will
get things
from journals, but I need first-hand funny stories.

I can't promise that I can put these on fictionL, but I
might have hand-
outs from the program that I could send if you give me your
names. I'm
really anxious to hear from you.

Thanks -

Pam Weinberg
Oriole Park Br
Chicago Public Library

xx
x~x
`

FROM: "Muriel Alsens" <[removed]@mgk.nslsilus.org>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 9:00 AM

Hi: When I was Head of Circulation two things stand out as I was calling
overdues. "My children were on their way to the library with the books
when their father kidnapped them (the children that is) and took them out
of the country". Well my first impulse was to laugh and say SURE. I was
actually speechless. The books were never returned. The second one I
called about an out of print overdue. The little boy who answered said mom
was in the shower but the book is right on the piano bench. Mom then came
to the phone and said "we lost that book and will have to pay for it" I
never said a word thinking I would get this little guy in trouble.
Muriel Alsens
At 07:21 PM 1/24/2000 -0600, you wrote:
>
>For a national library week program I am planning, I would like to do
>something with library humor, i.e. the actual funny things that happen to
>you because you work at a library. I would love it if you think of funny
>incidents, stories, patrons, malaprops,etc. and send them to me. You know
>what I'm talking about - the stories you come home and tell your family or
>the ones to regale your friends with. I'll also take poignant or
>endearing (especially good for children's experiences) stories that you as
>a staff member have experienced. I have some books and will get things
>from journals, but I need first-hand funny stories.
>
>I can't promise that I can put these on fictionL, but I might have hand-
>outs from the program that I could send if you give me your names. I'm
>really anxious to hear from you.
>
>Thanks -
>
>Pam Weinberg
>Oriole Park Br
>Chicago Public Library
>
>
>
>
>
>xx
>x~x
>`
>
>

FROM: <[removed]@hlc.actx.edu>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 9:04 AM

Back when I was Circulation Librarian and 8 months pregnant, I was manning
the desk during the lunch hour. Working with me was one of our shelvers, who
also happened to be pregnant at the time. A couple of our regular patrons,
two sisters who come in together quite often, approached the desk to check out
their books. One of them looked my co-worker and me over and nudged her
sister, saying, "Looks like librarians don't read ALL the time!"

Amanda Barrera
Amarillo Public Library
Amarillo, TX

FROM: "Lisa Colcord" <[removed]@ci.glendale.az.us>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 9:21 AM

Pam,

Since Go Ask Alice is (or was) anonymous, my library has it shelved by title instead of author. In the library online catalog, it says under call number, "GO ASK." I had a couple ladies come to the desk for help finding the book. When I explained how it worked, they told me they thought it was telling them to "Go ask." So they did.

Lisa Colcord
Librarian

P.S. I would love copies of your hand out:
Lisa Colcord
5959 W. Brown
Glendale, AZ 85302

>>> [removed]@chipublib.org 01/24/00 19:10 PM >>>

For a national library week program I am planning, I would like to do
something with library humor, i.e. the actual funny things that happen to
you because you work at a library. I would love it if you think of funny
incidents, stories, patrons, malaprops,etc. and send them to me. You know
what I'm talking about - the stories you come home and tell your family or
the ones to regale your friends with. I'll also take poignant or
endearing (especially good for children's experiences) stories that you as
a staff member have experienced. I have some books and will get things
from journals, but I need first-hand funny stories.

I can't promise that I can put these on fictionL, but I might have hand-
outs from the program that I could send if you give me your names. I'm
really anxious to hear from you.

Thanks -

Pam Weinberg
Oriole Park Br
Chicago Public Library

xx
x~x
`

FROM: "Kaite Mediatore" <[removed]@yahoo.com>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 10:11 AM

I was at the reference desk with one of the library
assistants when she was approached by a student who
was looking for a video that was a dramatic film
rather than comedic or documentary. Unfortunately, the
student posed his query in an unsual manner. The
conversation went something like this:

Student: Do you have a drama?

Library Assistant: Every day!

Supervisor: [laughs]


__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
Talk to your friends online with Yahoo! Messenger.
<A HREF="http://im.yahoo.com">http://im.yahoo.com</A>

FROM: "Marla" <[removed]@orion.mtgr.mtlib.org>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 10:46 AM

Many years ago when I worked the Reference Desk here, a woman
came in to ask a question. She had one of those voices that carry
and seem to echo no matter what volume level she is talking. She
wanted to know about the airplane that the Red Baron flew: "you
know, one of those Fokkers!" (said in about as boomily as she
could) only she wasn't pronouncing it right (it won't take much
imagination as to how she pronounced it). I kept saying something
like "I think we have some information on the Fokker (and
pronouncing it right) airplane; let me show you." But she kept
saying it the other way. There were quite a few icy stares at both
of us as I led her around the card catalog, stacks, etc. I was very
glad to find what she wanted quickly.

It's amazing how things can get so mixed up, but gratefully, we can
laugh about them later. BYE!

Marla/Great Falls Public Library/Acquisitions
301 2nd Ave N
Great Falls, MT 59401-2593
[removed]@orion.mtgr.mtlib.org

FROM: "Vicki Novak - LIBRARYX" <[removed]@MAIL.MARICOPA.GOV>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 11:00 AM

Now there actually is a book called "Tequila mockingbird : a Fey Croaker
novel" - probably meant as a joke title!

I'm sure this has happened to other red-faced librarians, but one time a
patron asked for a book on UNIX, but I heard EUNUCHS! Luckily, I figured
out what he really meant before he realized my mistake. A good argument for
the reference interview, I guess: "Would that be the computer operating
system or..."

Please send me your compiled list of library humor. I love this stuff!
Thanks!
Vicki Novak
North Central Regional Library
Maricopa County Library District
17811 N. 32nd St.
Phoenix, AZ 85032-1201

[removed]@mail.maricopa.gov

-----Original Message-----
From: Viccy Kemp [<A [removed]@ci.carrollton.tx.us">mailto:VKemp@ci.carrollton.tx.us</A>]
Sent: Tuesday, January 25, 2000 7:41 AM
To: [removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org'
Subject: RE: library humor


True story: In a previous life, I ran a bookstore for a large chain for ten
years. You would be amazed at the malapropisms that come along (or maybe
not!). My all time favorite was the student looking for "Tequila
Mockingbird." It was all I could do to not fall down on the floor laughing.
And now, every time I help someone looking for "To Kill a Mockingbird" now,
I have to smile.
Viccy Kemp
The opinions are my own; the library wouldn't want 'em!

FROM: "Woosley, Sheila M." <[removed]@mailserv.gcpl.lib.oh.us>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 11:16 AM

I would love a copy of your list!

Sheila Woosley
Greene County Public Library
76 East Market St
Xenia OH 45385

-----Original Message-----
From: Pamela M Weinberg [<A HREF="mailto:weinberg@chipublib.org">mailto:weinberg@chipublib.org</A>]
Sent: Monday, January 24, 2000 8:22 PM
To: [removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org
Subject: library humor



For a national library week program I am planning, I would like to do
something with library humor, i.e. the actual funny things that happen
to
you because you work at a library. I would love it if you think of
funny
incidents, stories, patrons, malaprops,etc. and send them to me. You
know
what I'm talking about - the stories you come home and tell your family
or
the ones to regale your friends with. I'll also take poignant or
endearing (especially good for children's experiences) stories that you
as
a staff member have experienced. I have some books and will get things
from journals, but I need first-hand funny stories.

I can't promise that I can put these on fictionL, but I might have hand-
outs from the program that I could send if you give me your names. I'm
really anxious to hear from you.

Thanks -

Pam Weinberg
Oriole Park Br
Chicago Public Library

xx
x~x
`

FROM: "Barb G." <[removed]@hotmail.com>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 11:28 AM

We as librarians are taught to be THE primary source for
supplying our patrons with much needed information...

I recently had an elderly woman have her husband drive her
to the library for the soul purpose of making an inquiry...
her question was, "Who was that lady that was using the
computer over there (she pointed at my internet computer),
the last time I was in? Was that my nephews wife who has
now left him for someone she met on the internet?"

I was totally dumbfounded at this question, luckily I
did have presence of mind enough to plead ignorance during
this one instance.

Should I feel inadequate at having this patron leave both
empty handed (materialistically), and without any new knowledge?

*chuckle*


>From: Richards Free Library <[removed]@sugar-river.net>
>Reply-To: [removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org
>To: [removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org
>Subject: Re: library humor
>Date: Tue, 25 Jan 2000 09:55:53 -0500
>
>Pam: I would love a copy of your handout. I have to speak to the Ladies
>Circle at the local church in March and that was the topic they selected.
>Andrea Thorpe
>At 07:21 PM 01/24/2000 -0600, you wrote:
> >
> >For a national library week program I am planning, I would like to do
> >something with library humor, i.e. the actual funny things that happen to
> >you because you work at a library. I would love it if you think of funny
> >incidents, stories, patrons, malaprops,etc. and send them to me. You
>know
> >what I'm talking about - the stories you come home and tell your family
>or
> >the ones to regale your friends with. I'll also take poignant or
> >endearing (especially good for children's experiences) stories that you
>as
> >a staff member have experienced. I have some books and will get things
> >from journals, but I need first-hand funny stories.
> >
> >I can't promise that I can put these on fictionL, but I might have hand-
> >outs from the program that I could send if you give me your names. I'm
> >really anxious to hear from you.
> >
> >Thanks -
> >
> >Pam Weinberg
> >Oriole Park Br
> >Chicago Public Library
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >xx
> >x~x
> >`
> >
> >
> >
>
>**********************************************************************
>Richards Free Library
>58 N. Main Street
>Newport, NH 03773
>(603) 863-3430
>(603) 863-3022 (fax)
>e-mail: [removed]@sugar-river.net
><A HREF="http://www.sugar-river.net/~rfl">http://www.sugar-river.net/~rfl</A>
>
>web site: <A HREF="http://www.sugar-river.net/~rfl">http://www.sugar-river.net/~rfl</A>

______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at <A HREF="http://www.hotmail.com">http://www.hotmail.com</A>

FROM: "Donna Jo Atwood" <[removed]@JCL.LIB.KS.US>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 12:04 PM

This one is only mildly amusing, but it was funny at the time.
The first day I went on my rural Bookmobile route, one of the stops included
a farm with new calves. The farmer decided since I was from the "Big City"
(pop. 16,000) I would like to meet one of the new babies. I tried to
explain that I had managed to see calves before, but he brushed aside my
protests and carried the two-day old calf onto the Bookmobile just for me!
That was only the start of what seemed to be a varied animal population
visiting the Bookmobile over the course of several. Besides the usual cats
and dogs, we saw any number of rabbits, chickens, guinea pigs, regular pigs,
raccoons, skunks (deodorized), snakes, lizards, frogs, and a goat, but the
calf remained my favorite.


> -----Original Message-----
> From: [removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org
> [<A HREF="mailto:owner-fiction_l@maillist.nslsilus.org]On">mailto:owner-fiction_l@maillist.nslsilus.org]On</A> Behalf Of Pamela M
> Weinberg
> Sent: Monday, January 24, 2000 7:22 PM
> To: [removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org
> Subject: library humor
>
>
>
> For a national library week program I am planning, I would like to do
> something with library humor, i.e. the actual funny things that happen to
> you because you work at a library. I would love it if you think of funny
> incidents, stories, patrons, malaprops,etc. and send them to me. You know
> what I'm talking about - the stories you come home and tell your family or
> the ones to regale your friends with. I'll also take poignant or
> endearing (especially good for children's experiences) stories that you as
> a staff member have experienced. I have some books and will get things
> from journals, but I need first-hand funny stories.
>
> I can't promise that I can put these on fictionL, but I might have hand-
> outs from the program that I could send if you give me your names. I'm
> really anxious to hear from you.
>
> Thanks -
>
> Pam Weinberg
> Oriole Park Br
> Chicago Public Library
>
>
>
>
>
> xx
> x~x
> `
>

FROM: "Karen A.K. Keller" <[removed]@tln.lib.mi.us>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 12:05 PM

On Tue, 25 Jan 2000, Barb G. wrote:

> I recently had an elderly woman have her husband drive her
> to the library for the soul purpose of making an inquiry...

Well, if it was truly her "soul" purpose and not her "sole" purpose then
maybe her question wasn't so far-fetched!

> her question was, "Who was that lady that was using the
> computer over there (she pointed at my internet computer),
> the last time I was in? Was that my nephews wife who has
> now left him for someone she met on the internet?"
>

Sorry... couldn't resist.

Karen Keller
Brighton (MI) District Library

FROM: "Diana Tixier Herald" <[removed]@wic.net>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 12:12 PM

We once had an elderly couple in the library looking through the
collection of audio books. He kept yelling out (at the top of his lungs)
the titles as he worked his way down the shelf. Just as I approached to
see if I could help (and help quiet him down) his wife stomped her foot
and yelled at the top of her lungs "I'm blind not deaf!" As it turned
out the helpful husband was indeed hard of hearing. Fortunately she went
away with books to listen to and he with books to read.

--
Happy reading,
Di Herald
[removed]@wic.net see the Genreflecting page at
<A HREF="http://www.mancon.com/genre/">http://www.mancon.com/genre/</A>
Rosenberg's First Law of Reading "Never apologize for your reading
tastes."

FROM: "Kate Kehoe" <[removed]@umich.edu>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 12:19 PM

I was waiting on a patron one day...a large state trooper who spoke with a
thick southern accent. He asked for books on "Poultry". Not sure if I had
heard him right I asked if he said "poultry" and he said yes, that is what
he said. Still unsure I asked if he meant chickens....he said, he meant
"Rhyming words". I was pretty embarrassed, but not as bad as a coworker who
though a patron asked for chess manuals when he really wanted a book on
incest. She had to hid in the back the rest of the day. YIKES!!!

Kate
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
University of Michigan Law School
Admissions Office
371 Legal Research
625 South State Street
Ann Arbor, MI 48109
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

FROM: "Musser Public Library" <[removed]@libby.rbls.lib.il.us>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 12:51 PM

Kate, we had someone aske for books on "abscess". Staff tried to clarify
it by saying "you mean like an infected wound"? But it turned out the
patron meant "incest"! Sheila

Reference Department Tel.No.:319-263-3472
Musser Public Library Fax No.:319-264-1033
304 Iowa Ave. [removed]@libby.rbls.lib.il.us
Muscatine, Iowa 52761 <A HREF="http://www.rbls.lib.il.us/mus/index.html">http://www.rbls.lib.il.us/mus/index.html</A>

On Tue, 25 Jan 2000, Kate Kehoe wrote:

> I was waiting on a patron one day...a large state trooper who spoke with a
> thick southern accent. He asked for books on "Poultry". Not sure if I had
> heard him right I asked if he said "poultry" and he said yes, that is what
> he said. Still unsure I asked if he meant chickens....he said, he meant
> "Rhyming words". I was pretty embarrassed, but not as bad as a coworker who
> though a patron asked for chess manuals when he really wanted a book on
> incest. She had to hid in the back the rest of the day. YIKES!!!
>
> Kate
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> University of Michigan Law School
> Admissions Office
> 371 Legal Research
> 625 South State Street
> Ann Arbor, MI 48109
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>

FROM: "Donna Jo Atwood" <[removed]@JCL.LIB.KS.US>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 1:43 PM

this reminds me of the patron that wanted Sign language books on Audio tape.

> -----Original Message-----
> From: [removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org
> [<A HREF="mailto:owner-fiction_l@maillist.nslsilus.org]On">mailto:owner-fiction_l@maillist.nslsilus.org]On</A> Behalf Of Diana Tixier
> Herald
> Sent: Tuesday, January 25, 2000 12:18 PM
> To: [removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org
> Subject: Re: library humor
>
>
> We once had an elderly couple in the library looking through the
> collection of audio books. He kept yelling out (at the top of his lungs)
> the titles as he worked his way down the shelf. Just as I approached to
> see if I could help (and help quiet him down) his wife stomped her foot
> and yelled at the top of her lungs "I'm blind not deaf!" As it turned
> out the helpful husband was indeed hard of hearing. Fortunately she went
> away with books to listen to and he with books to read.
>
> --
> Happy reading,
> Di Herald
> [removed]@wic.net see the Genreflecting page at
> <A HREF="http://www.mancon.com/genre/">http://www.mancon.com/genre/</A>
> Rosenberg's First Law of Reading "Never apologize for your reading
> tastes."
>
>

FROM: "Mary Van Dyke" <[removed]@CLSN3046.glenview.lib.il.us>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 1:46 PM

Please send me a copy of your list.

Mary Van Dyke
Glenview Public Library
1930 Glenview Rd.
Glenview, IL 60025

On Mon, 24 Jan 2000, Pamela M Weinberg wrote:

>
> For a national library week program I am planning, I would like to do
> something with library humor, i.e. the actual funny things that happen to
> you because you work at a library. I would love it if you think of funny
> incidents, stories, patrons, malaprops,etc. and send them to me. You know
> what I'm talking about - the stories you come home and tell your family or
> the ones to regale your friends with. I'll also take poignant or
> endearing (especially good for children's experiences) stories that you as
> a staff member have experienced. I have some books and will get things
> from journals, but I need first-hand funny stories.
>
> I can't promise that I can put these on fictionL, but I might have hand-
> outs from the program that I could send if you give me your names. I'm
> really anxious to hear from you.
>
> Thanks -
>
> Pam Weinberg
> Oriole Park Br
> Chicago Public Library
>
>
>
>
>
> xx
> x~x
> `
>
>

FROM: "Beth McGuire" <[removed]@ccl.charleston.lib.sc.us>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 2:20 PM

Years ago when I worked in reference, I had a woman tell me she wanted a
book to help her identify a spider. She went on to tell me that she'd been
bitten by a spider and her doctor wanted her to identify it. After going
through several books, she finally found a picture she believed matched the
spider in question. By this point she'd recounted the whole story to me
and I was pretty interested. I asked her where on her body she'd been
bitten (thinking she would say "oh, my leg" or "on my arm"). Imagine my
surprise when she said, "Oh right here on my butt!" and then proceeded to
hike up the leg of her shorts and show me! I still laugh thinkinging about
it!

Beth McGuire

***************************************
Beth McGuire
[removed]@ccpl.org
Charleston (SC) County Public Library
(843)805-6879

FROM: "Joan Ennis - Northfield Public Library" <[removed]@SELCO.LIB.MN.US>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 2:34 PM

When I was in college at UCLA I was hired to work on the reference
desk in the Government Publications section. I worked mainly evenings
and Saturdays, and some hours during the day. I was well trained and
I thought, and so did the librarians, that I did a good job. One day
a man came in, and I asked if I could help him. He looked at me and said
"I need someone bigger than you to answer my question!" (I'm only 5 ft.
tall, and looked younger than my age at that time). I was stunned by
his comment, and then could hardly resist laughing, when a well seasoned
librarian who happened to be there took over! I'm sure I will think of
more. Also, I would love a copy of the list also.

FROM: "Kaite Mediatore" <[removed]@yahoo.com>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 3:29 PM

Oh, I've got a good one, how about the patron who
asked for Speed Reading on Audio tape. This is true,
it happened to me last year, and by golly, I found him
something.

Kaite

--- Donna Jo Atwood <[removed]@JCL.LIB.KS.US> wrote:
> this reminds me of the patron that wanted Sign
> language books on Audio tape.
>
> > -----Original Message-----
> > From: [removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org
> > [<A HREF="mailto:owner-fiction_l@maillist.nslsilus.org]On">mailto:owner-fiction_l@maillist.nslsilus.org]On</A>
> Behalf Of Diana Tixier
> > Herald
> > Sent: Tuesday, January 25, 2000 12:18 PM
> > To: [removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org
> > Subject: Re: library humor
> >
> >
> > We once had an elderly couple in the library
> looking through the
> > collection of audio books. He kept yelling out (at
> the top of his lungs)
> > the titles as he worked his way down the shelf.
> Just as I approached to
> > see if I could help (and help quiet him down) his
> wife stomped her foot
> > and yelled at the top of her lungs "I'm blind not
> deaf!" As it turned
> > out the helpful husband was indeed hard of
> hearing. Fortunately she went
> > away with books to listen to and he with books to
> read.
> >
> > --
> > Happy reading,
> > Di Herald
> > [removed]@wic.net see the Genreflecting page at
> > <A HREF="http://www.mancon.com/genre/">http://www.mancon.com/genre/</A>
> > Rosenberg's First Law of Reading "Never apologize
> for your reading
> > tastes."
> >
> >
>
__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
Talk to your friends online with Yahoo! Messenger.
<A HREF="http://im.yahoo.com">http://im.yahoo.com</A>

FROM: "Fiction_L" <[removed]@nslsilus.ORG>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 4:39 PM

Pamela (et. al.)--

I once had a very young patron (5 years at the most) who had to do a report
for school. Her confused father had brought her to the library, and he
himself was having trouble translating. You see, she needed to do a report
on a "backless lizard." A lizard without a back??? I may not know much
about lizards, but this has to be new. I dragged out the DK Amphibians
book, which she excitedly recognized -- "He's in there, I saw him in that
book at school!"

In the index we found our prey -- the "basilisk lizard."


mmc
Mary McCarthy
ACLIN Support Librarian
Colorado State Library/BCR
[removed]@sni.net

FROM: "Cathy Reid" <[removed]@ccpl.lib.oh.us>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 4:44 PM

I once had a patron ask me if we had any pocket-sized Bibles...in LARGE
PRINT!!!

I also had someone ask me if I could tell her who wrote The Complete Works
of Shakespeare--it's true!!!

Cathy Reid
Clark County Public Library
Springfield, OH

FROM: "Carolyn Reinhard" <[removed]@nslsilus.ORG>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 5:28 PM

A patron was very disappointed to find our copy of the video "Smokey and
the Bandit, Part 2" checked out. He said he was in urgent need of it
because his son had a book report on it due the next day!

And then there was the man who complained that the record he was
listening to was playing backward. (never did figure that one out)

Oh these modern times in which we live......

Carolyn O'Donnell
Advisory Services Department
Arlington Heights Memorial Library
Arlington Heights, IL 60004

FROM: "Dana Donnell" <[removed]@kentlibrary.lib.mi.us>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 5:31 PM

I began my library career in a conservative, midwestern, rural library.
During my routine check-in procedures I discovered that either a patron or
another librarian had penciled a message inside one of our nonfiction
volumes. The book was _The Joy of Sex_. The message read, "catalog as
adult fiction." :-)

Dana Donnell--Public Services/Reference Librarian
Kent District Library--Wyoming Branch

Messages reflect personal, rather than Kent District Library, opinions.




On Mon, 24 Jan 2000, Pamela M Weinberg wrote:

>
> For a national library week program I am planning, I would like to do
> something with library humor, i.e. the actual funny things that happen to
> you because you work at a library. I would love it if you think of funny
> incidents, stories, patrons, malaprops,etc. and send them to me. You know
> what I'm talking about - the stories you come home and tell your family or
> the ones to regale your friends with. I'll also take poignant or
> endearing (especially good for children's experiences) stories that you as
> a staff member have experienced. I have some books and will get things
> from journals, but I need first-hand funny stories.
>
> I can't promise that I can put these on fictionL, but I might have hand-
> outs from the program that I could send if you give me your names. I'm
> really anxious to hear from you.
>
> Thanks -
>
> Pam Weinberg
> Oriole Park Br
> Chicago Public Library
>
>
>
>
>
> xx
> x~x
> `
>
>

FROM: "MILLS Kirby D" <[removed]@ci.eugene.or.us>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 5:47 PM

In a previous job, I had to find a book "by an American author" for a
teen assigned to read one. She preferred the shortest one possible,
and when I handed her JONATHAN LIVINGSTON SEAGULL she
exclaimed, "But mister! This isn't an American author, it's a seagull!"

And the woman wanting to know about the symbolic importance of
flies, of which she had a great number in her house. It wasn't due to
the summer, the food inside, etc.--it was definitely witchcraft.
(This wasn't in Amityville)

In my current job we have a bit more technology. One man tried to
send a fax by pressing the paper against the computer screen and
hitting the Enter button.

Or the woman who asked where she could get religion.

One of our best patrons is an importer/exporter and he was looking
for a pharmacy in Andorra. His client was an Arab shiek who wanted
to obtain *one hundred thousand* Viagra tablets. What is the shelf
life on this drug? Were a lot of people going to take a few, or---?

(These get steadily less wholesome, sorry)

My colleague helped a young woman who wanted to find the legal
definition of sodomy in the Oregon Revised Statutes. They found it
and she read the text, then concluded, "Yep. That's what we were
doing."

At one point staff were alerted that someone was....having a little
too much fun with himself in the stacks. He was gone but un-
mistakeable evidence was found--on a book about Richard Nixon.

FROM: "Lynda Whitton-Henley" <[removed]@intcomm.net>
REC'D: 1/25/00, 11:46 PM

This happens just a couple of months ago at our branch. Lady comes in and want
that book that is something like "Much to do about Nothing." I ask if she
wants Shakespeare's play. No, no it's another, and someone said she just had
to read this one. Something was ringing a bell in my head, I asked if it might
have to due with some current psychological approach, relationships, etc. I
could vaguely remember a cutesy title that we had, but could not bring it to
the surface. Since I was busy at the circ desk, I steered her to the 153's or
there abouts. After a bit, she comes smiling out and said she had it. It was
Richard Carlson's "Don't Sweat the Small Stuff.... I can see how the two could
be exchanged in thought. I've just bee waiting to tell others about this, when
sharing lib. humor.

Thanks for the opportunity. I'd love a copy of your program, or a complilation
of your replies.

Lynda Whitton-Henley, Br. Mgr.
3202 McKinzie Rd.
Corpus Christi, TX 78410

PS We all need a good dash of humor at work and home.

Richards Free Library wrote:

> Pam: I would love a copy of your handout. I have to speak to the Ladies
> Circle at the local church in March and that was the topic they selected.
> Andrea Thorpe
> At 07:21 PM 01/24/2000 -0600, you wrote:
> >
> >For a national library week program I am planning, I would like to do
> >something with library humor, i.e. the actual funny things that happen to
> >you because you work at a library. I would love it if you think of funny
> >incidents, stories, patrons, malaprops,etc. and send them to me. You know
> >what I'm talking about - the stories you come home and tell your family or
> >the ones to regale your friends with. I'll also take poignant or
> >endearing (especially good for children's experiences) stories that you as
> >a staff member have experienced. I have some books and will get things
> >from journals, but I need first-hand funny stories.
> >
> >I can't promise that I can put these on fictionL, but I might have hand-
> >outs from the program that I could send if you give me your names. I'm
> >really anxious to hear from you.
> >
> >Thanks -
> >
> >Pam Weinberg
> >Oriole Park Br
> >Chicago Public Library
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >xx
> >x~x
> >`
> >
> >
> >
>
> **********************************************************************
> Richards Free Library
> 58 N. Main Street
> Newport, NH 03773
> (603) 863-3430
> (603) 863-3022 (fax)
> e-mail: [removed]@sugar-river.net
> <A HREF="http://www.sugar-river.net/~rfl">http://www.sugar-river.net/~rfl</A>
>
> web site: <A HREF="http://www.sugar-river.net/~rfl">http://www.sugar-river.net/~rfl</A>

FROM: <[removed]@aol.com>
REC'D: 1/26/00, 7:32 AM

I had a teenager tell me, "I need that book where you look up articles. You
know, 'The Periodic Table of Magazines.' "
That's now my favorite name for the "Readers' Guide ..."

Sherri McCarthy

FROM: "Nina Kennedy" <[removed]@nspl.lib.in.us>
REC'D: 1/26/00, 10:00 AM

Hi Pamela,
This happened to me before Christmas. I don't know if you would want it for your program for Library Week, but we (the reference librarians) had a good laugh...
I answered the phone at the reference desk and found myself speaking with a very nice woman who wanted to know the distance from Bethlehem to Nazareth because she would be bicycling between the two towns over the Christmas holiday. I could not find the answer immediately so I assured her I would call her back. Surprisingly I spent the better part of the morning trying to find the answer. All the almanacs, atlases and internet sites I looked at did not provide distances between destinations outside the U.S., or if they did, they were between major cities. In the end I found a road map of Israel and found the distances between Nazareth and Jerusalem and between Jersalem and Bethlehem and added the two together. When I called her back she was very appreciative and I commented that it sounded like it would be an exciting vacation and asked her if she was worried about crime or terrorism on such a trip. She then said... "Oh I am doing this trip on my exercise bicycle at home, I always do some such immaginary trip on my exercise bicycle over the holidays because it is more fun that way! Needless to say I was surprised, but I was also a little frustrated that I had totally missunderstood what she was doing! Anyway we had a good laugh about it in the end.
Nina Kennedy
Noblesville Southeastern Public Library

>>> Pamela M Weinberg <[removed]@chipublib.org> 01/24 8:21 PM >>>

For a national library week program I am planning, I would like to do
something with library humor, i.e. the actual funny things that happen to
you because you work at a library. I would love it if you think of funny
incidents, stories, patrons, malaprops,etc. and send them to me. You know
what I'm talking about - the stories you come home and tell your family or
the ones to regale your friends with. I'll also take poignant or
endearing (especially good for children's experiences) stories that you as
a staff member have experienced. I have some books and will get things
from journals, but I need first-hand funny stories.

I can't promise that I can put these on fictionL, but I might have hand-
outs from the program that I could send if you give me your names. I'm
really anxious to hear from you.

Thanks -

Pam Weinberg
Oriole Park Br
Chicago Public Library

xx
x~x
`

FROM: "Rachel Kohl Community Library" <[removed]@delco.lib.pa.us>
REC'D: 1/26/00, 10:22 AM

I would also like a copy of the program. Thanks

Meg Hawkins
Director
Rachel Kohl Community Library
689 Smithbridge Rd. P.O. Box 931
Concordville PA 19331
>-
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Pamela M Weinberg [[removed]@chipublib.org]
> Sent: Monday, January 24, 2000 8:22 PM
[removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org
> Subject: library humor
>
>
> For a national library week program I am planning, I would
>like to do
> something with library humor, i.e. the actual funny things
>that happen to
> you because you work at a library. I would love it if you
>think of funny
> incidents, stories, patrons, malaprops,etc. and send them to
>me. You know
> what I'm talking about - the stories you come home and tell
>your family or
> the ones to regale your friends with. I'll also take
>poignant or
> endearing (especially good for children's experiences)
>stories that you as
> a staff member have experienced. I have some books and will
>get things
> from journals, but I need first-hand funny stories.
>
> I can't promise that I can put these on fictionL, but I
>might have hand-
> outs from the program that I could send if you give me your
>names. I'm
> really anxious to hear from you.
>
> Thanks -
>
> Pam Weinberg
> Oriole Park Br
> Chicago Public Library
>
>
>
>
>
> xx
> x~x
> `
>
>

FROM: "Jeanne Linn" <[removed]@libby.org>
REC'D: 1/26/00, 11:07 AM

FROM: "Joan E. Ludlow" <[removed]@tln.lib.mi.us>
REC'D: 1/26/00, 11:17 AM

My own favorite was finding "Death of A Salesman" cataloged as a mystery.

Joan Ludlow
Hazel Park Library (It wasn't here!)

FROM: "Held, Ruth" <[removed]@plcmc.lib.nc.us>
REC'D: 1/26/00, 11:26 AM

I'm enjoying all this library humor. Here's mine. The first week I worked
in the North Carolina Room, our genealogy and local history room, a woman
called with a question, which I answered. A few minutes later, the director
came in with a smile on her face and told me that she had just received a
call from a woman who complained, "Why do you have that Yankee working in
the North Carolina Room?". Later, when I worked in Telephone Reference, a
patron called to ask what the "W" in NWACP stood for.

Ruth Held
Information Specialist
Public Library of Charlotte and Mecklenburg County
[removed]@plcmc.lib.nc.us

FROM: "Winfield Public Library" <[removed]@horizon.hit.net>
REC'D: 1/26/00, 11:31 AM

A librarian that works with us had this happen a few years ago. She had a
very bad cold, and was having trouble hearing. A young man came in and was
looking for information on what she understood him to say, genocide - after
she has pulled several things dealing with the Holocaust a very puzzled
young man repeated his question - he was actually looking for information
on spermacide!

Joan Cales

Joan Cales
Special Services Librarian
Winfield Public Library
<<A HREF="http://www.wpl.org">http://www.wpl.org</A>>
email <[removed]@horizon.hit.net>

FROM: "Miller" <[removed]@suffolk.lib.ny.us>
REC'D: 1/26/00, 1:09 PM

When I first statred working at a midsize library on Long Island a patron
came to the reference desk and asked for the Shakespear book. She was
quit puzzled when we asked her which one.Just recently I had a patron ask
for the book Waterlogged, what she really wanted was Million Dollar
Mermaid by Esther Williams.
Just as an aside does anyone remember the title and or author of the
book that 60 Minutes did a segment on this past Sunday? Thanks in advance.
Cindy

FROM: "Kathleen Martin" <[removed]@gvpl.victoria.bc.ca>
REC'D: 1/26/00, 1:45 PM

A patron came in one day with a very bad cold. She asked for a book on
making love. When several titles were offered to her-she was obviously
shocked. It turned out she wanted something on making gloves...

Kathleen Martin
Co-ordinator of Community Services
Greater Victoria Public Library
Victoria, B.C.

FROM: "Tom Dillie" <[removed]@wadsworth.lib.oh.us>
REC'D: 1/26/00, 1:57 PM

A couple of years ago in the fall we had a patron call looking for
information on "Mary Weather" for her child's assignment. The Reference
Assistant asked for a little more information about this woman, and the patron
replied "You know, she went out west with Lewis and Clark." After we put her
on hold and had a chuckle, we straightened that one out. It was during the
explorers assignment, so we should have known.
We also enjoyed the patron who called asking for the address of the
national headquarters of the nondenominational churches.

Tom Dillie, Adult Services Librarian
Wadsworth Public Library
132 Broad St.
Wadsworth OH 44281
www.wadsworth.lib.oh.us

>
>
>

FROM: "Susan K Sanders" <[removed]@scls.lib.wi.us>
REC'D: 1/26/00, 3:48 PM

I had a teenaged patron as me for a book "by Jonathan Livingston Seagull".

Susan Sanders
Madison Public Library

FROM: "Carolyn Reinhard" <[removed]@nslsilus.ORG>
REC'D: 1/26/00, 4:24 PM

Though these events did not happen to me, my coworkers shared them and
we all enjoyed a laugh.

A woman placed a pile of books on the Circulation Desk. Seeing that they
were wet, my friend assuming that the woman was returning them, commented that
it must be raining out. The woman said she didn't think it was raining,
and that she wanted to check the pile of books out. My friend was puzzled
about the drops of water on the books - until the woman explained that
she had been in the restroom washing them, as she did with ALL the books
she checks out.

Several years ago, one of our "daytime regulars" was a tall, thin young
man who had recently begun dressing as a woman. Steve/Stephanie asked the
reference librarians to help him find Consumer Reports' best reccommendation
for a cordless razor. His parents had tossed him out when he started cross
dressing, and he couldn't always find a place to shave - and his heavy beard
was ruining his look. One day someone reported that there was a person
crawling around in the stacks. When the security guard went to investigate, he
found Steve/Stephanie on his hands and knees - because the spikey high-heeled
boots he wore with his outfit hurt his feet too much for him to walk in!!!

Just another day at the library.

Carolyn O'Donnell
Advisory Services Department
Arlington Heights Memorial Library
Arlington Heights, IL 60004

FROM: "Darla Brown" <[removed]@kckpl.lib.ks.us>
REC'D: 1/26/00, 4:38 PM

This has been so much fun...I used to work at an academic library in up state Illinois - we had someone call the reference desk asking "Who did the Picasso sculpture in Daley Plaza?" I also worked the information desk, and yes, we did have students come in asking if we had books they could read, as well as seniors coming in saying they had never been in the library before...eeeeek!
Here in KC, the best so far is the young man who came up to the desk asking for 'The Source'. I asked what he was researching and he said, "I don't know, my girlfriend told me to come up here and get The Source." I then asked what his girlfriend was researching...he went back and asked her. He comes backs and says, "She said she wanted to look up some words." I handed him a Thesaurus. Ain't this the best job ever???

Also, the New Jersey State Library has a good web site devoted to library humor:
<A HREF="http://sussex.njstatelib.org/njlib/lbhumtoc.htm">http://sussex.njstatelib.org/njlib/lbhumtoc.htm</A>

...and while I'm taking up bandwidth...for those of you still looking for display ideas...try <A HREF="http://www.calibraries.org/librarylovers/...maintained">http://www.calibraries.org/librarylovers/...maintained</A> by the Friends & Foundations of California Libraries. Look at the Promotional Calendar of Ideas...they provide several ideas by the month!


--
Darla J. Brown
Readers Services Librarian
West Wyandotte Branch
Kansas, City Ks Public Library


"If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton
you might as well make it dance."
George Bernard Shaw

FROM: "Lynn Silence" <[removed]@imail.slcl.lib.mo.us>
REC'D: 1/26/00, 4:47 PM

This probably wasn't as humorous at the time it happened as it is now. It
was on the dreaded April 15, one of our branches had closed, but the staff
was still in the building finishing up the closing chores because they were
late persuading patrons to leave--how we love those last procrastinating
tax payers! A man came to the door and knocked frantically. He wanted a
rather obscure tax form and wasn't going to take no for an answer. Before
anyone could reason with him or offer to bring it out to him, he moved
back, took a running leap and cleared the waist-high security gate! If
there were justice in the world, he would have either broken his leg or
been made to get back out the same way he got in! There is, however, no
justice in the world--he strolled back out triumphantly.

Lynn K. Silence Manager, Collection Development
St. Louis County Library
300 Clarkson Road, Ellisville, Missouri 63011
Voice: 636-227-1138, Fax: 636-227-9632
"To my thinking, a great librarian must have a clear head, a strong hand
and above all a great heart...most of the men who will achieve this greatness
will be women." Melvil Dewey

FROM: "Denise M. McFarland" <[removed]@webryders.com>
REC'D: 1/26/00, 7:50 PM

All these remarks about Jonathan Livingston Seagull reminds me of the time I
noticed that
one of my predecessors catalogued it in the 598.2 section!

Denise McFarland
Sullivan PL
Sullivan, NH

FROM: "Mary Clemens" <[removed]@3gcs.com>
REC'D: 1/26/00, 10:08 PM

A lot of our library humor has come from misunderstanding
what a patron is asking for oftentimes because of an accent
or unclear enunciation.

We had a young patron ask for what we thought was "a Nazi" book.
After showing him a number of books on WWII and the Holocaust
none of which seemed right, he elaborated - "You know, a Nazi - the spider
(Anansi)".

I mistook a patron asking for TOEFL books and directed her to the dolphin
books. We kept saying what appeared to be the same word - back and forth to
each other until it finally clicked.

One of my prized questions came from a middle school student who
needed information on that famous gangster - Al Pacino. After swallowing a
smile - I covered for him by saying that I thought maybe Al Pacino had
played Al Capone or another gangster sometime.

We often remark that someone should start a list of these. They're too
priceless to forget.

Have fun.

Mary Clemens
Children's Librarian

Carol Stream Public Library
Carol Stream, IL 60188
[removed]@3gcs.com

----- Original Message -----
From: Pamela M Weinberg <[removed]@chipublib.org>
To: <[removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org>
Sent: Monday, January 24, 2000 7:21 PM
Subject: library humor


>
> For a national library week program I am planning, I would like to do
> something with library humor, i.e. the actual funny things that happen to
> you because you work at a library. I would love it if you think of funny
> incidents, stories, patrons, malaprops,etc. and send them to me. You know
> what I'm talking about - the stories you come home and tell your family or
> the ones to regale your friends with. I'll also take poignant or
> endearing (especially good for children's experiences) stories that you as
> a staff member have experienced. I have some books and will get things
> from journals, but I need first-hand funny stories.
>
> I can't promise that I can put these on fictionL, but I might have hand-
> outs from the program that I could send if you give me your names. I'm
> really anxious to hear from you.
>
> Thanks -
>
> Pam Weinberg
> Oriole Park Br
> Chicago Public Library
>
>
>
>
>
> xx
> x~x
> `
>
>

FROM: "Mary K Chelton" <[removed]@pop.mail.rcn.net>
REC'D: 1/27/00, 7:55 AM

The discussion below is almost straight out of Pat Dewdney's and
Gillian Mitchell's classic article, "Oranges and Peaches:
Communication Accidents in the Reference Interview," that appeared in
RQ a couple years ago. Sorry not to have the cite handy, but it is
well worth reading as a typology of these kinds of things.

Mary K.

>A lot of our library humor has come from misunderstanding
>what a patron is asking for oftentimes because of an accent
>or unclear enunciation.
>
>We had a young patron ask for what we thought was "a Nazi" book.
>After showing him a number of books on WWII and the Holocaust
>none of which seemed right, he elaborated - "You know, a Nazi - the spider
>(Anansi)".
>
>I mistook a patron asking for TOEFL books and directed her to the dolphin
>books. We kept saying what appeared to be the same word - back and forth to
>each other until it finally clicked.
>
>One of my prized questions came from a middle school student who
>needed information on that famous gangster - Al Pacino. After swallowing a
>smile - I covered for him by saying that I thought maybe Al Pacino had
>played Al Capone or another gangster sometime.
>
>We often remark that someone should start a list of these. They're too
>priceless to forget.
>
>Have fun.
>
>Mary Clemens
>Children's Librarian
>
>Carol Stream Public Library
>Carol Stream, IL 60188
[removed]@3gcs.com
>
>----- Original Message -----
>From: Pamela M Weinberg <[removed]@chipublib.org>
>To: <[removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org>
>Sent: Monday, January 24, 2000 7:21 PM
>Subject: library humor
>
>
> >
> > For a national library week program I am planning, I would like to do
> > something with library humor, i.e. the actual funny things that happen to
> > you because you work at a library. I would love it if you think of funny
> > incidents, stories, patrons, malaprops,etc. and send them to me. You know
> > what I'm talking about - the stories you come home and tell your family or
> > the ones to regale your friends with. I'll also take poignant or
> > endearing (especially good for children's experiences) stories that you as
> > a staff member have experienced. I have some books and will get things
> > from journals, but I need first-hand funny stories.
> >
> > I can't promise that I can put these on fictionL, but I might have hand-
> > outs from the program that I could send if you give me your names. I'm
> > really anxious to hear from you.
> >
> > Thanks -
> >
> > Pam Weinberg
> > Oriole Park Br
> > Chicago Public Library
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > xx
> > x~x
> > `
> >
> >

************************************************************************
Home: Work:
Graduate School of Library
35 Mercury Ave. & Information Studies
East Patchogue, NY 11772 Queens College
516 (as of 4/1, 631) 286-4255 254 Rosenthal Library
[removed]@erols.com 65-30 Kissena Blvd.
Flushing, NY 11367
718/997-3667 or 3790
718/997-3797 fax
*************************************************************************

"I would like, to begin with, to say that though parents, husbands,
children, lovers and friends are all very well, they are not dogs."
Elizabeth Von Arnim
1866-1941

FROM: "Roger Carswell" <[removed]@midusa.net>
REC'D: 1/27/00, 8:55 AM

I tried sending this directly to your e-mail address but it bounced back,
so guess I'll have to post it to the list. I'd also like to receive your
compilation.

**************************************************************
Roger Carswell
Southeast Kansas Library System/Iola Public Library
218 E. Madison
Iola, KS 66749
(316) 365-5136
[removed]@midusa.net

FROM: "Fran Tracey" <[removed]@hotmail.com>
REC'D: 1/27/00, 9:06 AM

Could I have a copy of your list too?

TIA
Fran

[removed]@hotmail.com
______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at <A HREF="http://www.hotmail.com">http://www.hotmail.com</A>

FROM: "Debbie Somchay" <[removed]@dupagels.lib.il.us>
REC'D: 1/27/00, 9:35 AM

Have you tried the CBS website www.cbsnews.com?

-----Original Message-----
From: Miller [[removed]@suffolk.lib.ny.us]
Sent: Wednesday, January 26, 2000 1:14 PM
[removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org
Subject: Re: library humor

When I first statred working at a midsize library on Long Island a patron
came to the reference desk and asked for the Shakespear book. She was
quit puzzled when we asked her which one.Just recently I had a patron ask
for the book Waterlogged, what she really wanted was Million Dollar
Mermaid by Esther Williams.
Just as an aside does anyone remember the title and or author of the
book that 60 Minutes did a segment on this past Sunday? Thanks in advance.
Cindy

FROM: "M. Shields" <[removed]@mail.creativeonline.com>
REC'D: 1/27/00, 10:58 AM

Mary Clemens wrote:

> A lot of our library humor has come from misunderstanding
> what a patron is asking for oftentimes because of an accent
> or unclear enunciation.
>

Very true! Once I had a patron ask if we had "physical rapport." Since he was
on
the tall-dark-and-handsome side, I was nothing loathe to explore this question
in
depth. It turned out, however, that he wanted to know whether we had fiscal
reports. :-)
(Red face.)

Another time a youngish patron, chewing a wad of gum that would choke a camel,
asked for material on "syllogism." Somewhat perplexed but impressed, I started
looking up
"sy- ." I noticed an odd look on the patron's face (i.e., "what is she,
stupid?) and did
what I should have done initially: ask questions. It took a couple of more
minutes, and a
request that he take the gum out of his mouth, to determine that he wanted books
about
Shirley Chisholm.

FROM: <[removed]@infoave.net>
REC'D: 1/27/00, 11:39 AM

When I first started here as a reference librarian, I worked in
telephones. Being from Wisconsin was sometimes a disability when neither
the patron nor I could see each other's face. I managed to figure out the
ole/bole/oil/boil thing, and learned that Brrr was the local
pronounciation for Berea and even that sometimes people said "Grimevul"
for our fair city. But one day a man called and said he needed the
spelling for "pearl" (we thought). He clarified, "Not pearls like you
wear, but like we live in purlous times." Ah.

Debbie Spear
Greenville (SC) County Library

FROM: "Diana Tixier Herald" <[removed]@wic.net>
REC'D: 1/27/00, 12:55 PM

Ok, with all the "foreign" language type anecdotes, I just had to chime
in with this one. I was the librarian for a small county library in
rural eastern North Carolina for a couple years. Before I started
acquiring a southern accent, while my Colorado nearly accentless : )
English was intact, I received a call from a patron who finally in
exasperation (I could understand him he just couldn't understand me)
asked very slowly and deliberately "Don't ya'all have anyone there who
speaks Southern?"

--
Happy reading,
Di Herald
[removed]@wic.net see the Genreflecting page at
<A HREF="http://www.mancon.com/genre/">http://www.mancon.com/genre/</A>
Rosenberg's First Law of Reading "Never apologize for your reading
tastes."

FROM: "Carolyn Reinhard" <[removed]@nslsilus.ORG>
REC'D: 1/27/00, 1:02 PM

Another moment surfaced from the depths of memory:

The following exchange was part of a search for more information about
the request for the video "Stockwood"
Me - "We have the movie "Silkwood" - about the danger of radiation to
the plant workers - is that the one you're thinking of?"
Him - "no - you know Stockwood - the one about that famous rock concert
in the 60's."
Me - OOOOOHHHHHHH

Carolyn O'Donnell
Advisory Services Department
Arlington Heights Memorial Library
Arlington Heights, IL 60004

FROM: "Lisa Price" <[removed]@MtLaurel.Lib.NJ.US>
REC'D: 1/27/00, 2:52 PM

I have to say, one thing I like about this thread is that the majority of the
stories seem to be of the "I didn't understand the patron" nature, rather than
"you'll never believe what this stupid patron said/did." I think it reflects
well on us that we are willing to accept our part in the miscommunications.
Lisa Price
Mount Laurel (NJ) Library
All opinions are entirely my very own.

[removed]@infoave.net wrote:

> When I first started here as a reference librarian, I worked in
> telephones. Being from Wisconsin was sometimes a disability when neither
> the patron nor I could see each other's face. I managed to figure out the
> ole/bole/oil/boil thing, and learned that Brrr was the local
> pronounciation for Berea and even that sometimes people said "Grimevul"
> for our fair city. But one day a man called and said he needed the
> spelling for "pearl" (we thought). He clarified, "Not pearls like you
> wear, but like we live in purlous times." Ah.
>
> Debbie Spear
> Greenville (SC) County Library

FROM: "Connie Jo Ozinga" <[removed]@SELCO.LIB.MN.US>
REC'D: 1/27/00, 2:58 PM

Lynn's story about the man determined to get a tax form after hours
reminded me....

We had a fire during tax form season. All the alarms went off, the
building was evacuated, the fire department came, the small fire was put
out.

The fire was an arson fire , and there were signs throughout the building
of other failed attempts to start fires. The next day we sat down with the
arson investigators to review the security tapes in an effort to identify
the culprit.

One set of tapes showed the scene in a short corridor off the lobby. View
was restroom doors to the left, tax form displays to the right, beyond
those the lobby straight ahead, including the bottom of the stairs from the
second floor.

We could see the entire building evacuation on the tapes. First we saw
all the adult services patrons came from the right through the lobby and
exited the building, followed immediately by all the children's services
patrons coming from the left, through the lobby and exiting the building.
A few seconds later we saw the wave of patrons from the second floor came
down the floor through the lobby and out the exits. Several seconds of no
movement. Then one last patron comes running around the corner, down the
corridor toward the camera, stops, grabs a tax form, turns, and exits the
building.

The fire alarms were blaring and there was smoke in the building. He knew
what his priorities were.

Connie O

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Connie Jo Ozinga, Library [removed]@selco.lib.mn.us
Rochester Public Library (507) 285-8011
101 Second St. SE (507) 292-7866 fax
Rochester, MN 55904
<A HREF="http://www.ci.rochester.mn.us/library">http://www.ci.rochester.mn.us/library</A>
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

FROM: "Karen Traynor" <[removed]@midyork.lib.ny.us>
REC'D: 1/27/00, 4:39 PM

I would also love to see the final list of library humor when it is
compiled--great potential for speeches!

The hardest time I ever had keeping a straight face was when a high school
student came in. He had to do a paper on a political activist from the 60's
and had chosen Abbie Hoffman. He said to me "I need to know what she was
famous for and what she is doing now". I didn't reply with the first thing
that came to my mind which was "Well, HE is now pushing up daisies!"

Karen Traynor
Sullivan Free Library
519 McDonnell Street
Chittenango, NY 13037

FROM: "Carolyn Reinhard" <[removed]@nslsilus.ORG>
REC'D: 1/27/00, 5:38 PM

Okay - Jon K. just reminded me of this one, and asked me to tell you
about it. So Jon, this one's for you.

A few months ago, a lady stopped at the Computer Desk (which is in close
proximity to the videos, hence the question) and she asked for videos on fox
painting. As my brain raced through the possibilities (painting a picture of a
fox, painting a statue of a fox, painting a LIVE fox, or using the fox as the
brush) I tried to stall for time and said "I'm not familiar with that kind of
painting, can you describe it for me." She explained that it involved using
paint to look like marble, or other stonework; and she thought it might be
spelled F-A-U-X.


Carolyn O'Donnell
Advisory Services Department
Arlington Heights Memorial Library
Arlington Heights, IL 60004

FROM: "LUCIE HOLZEMER" <[removed]@duluth.lib.mn.us>
REC'D: 1/28/00, 10:10 AM

In my first life as a Homebound librarian at DPL in the 1980's: As my
supervisor was training me in she told me that a woman had called to
request that we send Large print books to her father. She thought that
about six would be good and that her father liked westerns. I called him
at the nursing home to tell he we would start delivering. He was hard of
hearing but I did manage each month to communicate that the volunteer
would be coming again and he would said that he did want books. So each
month I would call and then I would send him 6 more large print
westerns.
After about 6 months he asked me "Do you read all those books you send
me?" And I' m thinking he's upset with the content so I say to him " no,
was there something wrong?." Only he can't really hear me or understand
what I'm saying. We keep talking at each other for few more minutes and
I'm getting more nervous thinking "what should I know about the content
(portrayal of Indians, sexuality...)" and I'm trying to figure out if
he's upset by one of the books. And then he says "I was just going to
say 'you must really like westerns!'".

FROM: "Fiction_L" <[removed]@nslsilus.ORG>
REC'D: 1/28/00, 11:31 AM

We had a rather hostile woman call the Reference desk, demanding to know the
first name and address of Dr. Fox.
We asked where he practiced and what his specialty was. She responded, "He
practices in Arizona, and he's either
a dermatologist or a cosmotologist!"

Sarah Herlache
Foothills Branch Library
Glendale, Arizona


Held, Ruth wrote:

> I'm enjoying all this library humor. Here's mine. The first week I worked
> in the North Carolina Room, our genealogy and local history room, a woman
> called with a question, which I answered. A few minutes later, the director
> came in with a smile on her face and told me that she had just received a
> call from a woman who complained, "Why do you have that Yankee working in
> the North Carolina Room?". Later, when I worked in Telephone Reference, a
> patron called to ask what the "W" in NWACP stood for.
>
> Ruth Held
> Information Specialist
> Public Library of Charlotte and Mecklenburg County
> [removed]@plcmc.lib.nc.us

FROM: "Fiction_L" <[removed]@nslsilus.ORG>
REC'D: 1/28/00, 11:33 AM

When I was a L.S. student at Simmons and working part-time in a Boston-area
public
library, a patron came in and asked for the "Anti-Christ Cookbook"!!! None
of the
reference staff could locate any such title. (And what would the recipes be?
Devil's
Food Cake?) I, the lowly intern, asked if perhaps he meant the "Anarchist's
Cookbook" the infamous bomb-making recipe book. The library didn't own it
but the
patron sidled over to me and slyly asked, "Are you into 'Political
Science'?" (wink,
wink). I was only 22 at the time, quite embarassed and could only blurt out,
"No,
sir, I'm only into 'Library Science'!"

--
Cathleen C. Beaudoin
Library Director
Dover Public Library
73 Locust Street
Dover, New Hampshire 03820
phone: (603) 743-6050
fax: (603) 743-6053
email: [removed]@dover.lib.nh.us
library website: <A HREF="http://www.dover.lib.nh.us">http://www.dover.lib.nh.us</A>

FROM: "Fiction_L" <[removed]@nslsilus.ORG>
REC'D: 1/28/00, 11:34 AM

My name is Jane. My story involves another staff member. She was working
part-time on the reference desk and I was training her. One day she looked
in the card catalog and found a card that said....."See Jane's book of
..........

Over she came to my desk and said, "Jane, can I see your book of......."!!!!

I'd love to see a copy of this list when it is compiled.

Jane Hyden

Jane Hyden
Library Assistant
ADS Team
Library of Michigan
717 W. Allegan, P.O. Box 30007
Lansing, MI 48909

Phone: 517-373-5191
Fax: 517-373-3615

*Usual Disclaimer*

FROM: "Marti Kaye" <[removed]@getnet.com>
REC'D: 1/28/00, 1:55 PM

> We had a rather hostile woman call the Reference desk, demanding to know
the
> first name and address of Dr. Fox.
> We asked where he practiced and what his specialty was. She responded,
"He
> practices in Arizona, and he's either
> a dermatologist or a cosmotologist!"
>
> Sarah Herlache
> Foothills Branch Library
> Glendale, Arizona

sarah,

i live near Glendale. where is the Foothills Branch Library located?

marti

FROM: "Pam Koehler" <[removed]@wcic.org>
REC'D: 1/28/00, 3:52 PM

Hi all,

This really isn't humor, but is just something totally unexpected. My library,
West Lafayette Public Library, is near Purdue University. We get a lot of student
walk ins, plus we are located in the 'village' -the commercial area surrounding
campus. We recently had a tattoo parlor move in about a block away. They became
patrons almost immediately. We would never have anticipated this. For awhile they
were in almost daily looking for all sorts of different things: Chinese characters,
symbols, art work, etc. The first time I helped them they wanted a picture of "The
Thinker". They didn't want a picture of the statue, but rather a drawing of the
statue they could use as a pattern for a tattoo. They were always very polite. We
could tell where they were from by the amount of skin covered by tattoos. They
have since moved a few blocks away and I don't see them nearly as much. I don't
know if it's because we're further away or that they have all the important tattoo
patterns.

Pam
West Lafayette Public Library
West Lafayette, IN

FROM: "Anjan Ray" <[removed]@usa.net>
REC'D: 1/29/00, 2:53 AM

At the college where I teach part-time, the Library is referred to as the
Media Resource Centre (primarily because it has much more by way of audio,
magazines and journals). We had a spices and food ingredients salesman land
up there one day because he had phoned in by accident (wrong number!) and
heard "Meatier Source Center."

Do mail me a copy of the compilation as and when it is completed. Am sure it
will make for hilarious reading!

Thanks
Anjan

____________________________________________________________________
Get free email and a permanent address at <A HREF="http://www.netaddress.com/?N=1">http://www.netaddress.com/?N=1</A>

FROM: "Donna Jo Atwood" <[removed]@JCL.LIB.KS.US>
REC'D: 1/30/00, 12:33 PM

I liked the conversation with the patron who asked for the meaning of the
word "fooella" (this was what I heard anyway). I asked "Can you spell it
for me please?"
"No, but you know fooella"
"Do you think it starts with an F?" I asked.
"I don't know."
"Can you use it in a sentence?" I asked.
"Sure. You know, when a caterpillar spins a cocoon and it comes out,
fooella! it's a butterfly."
"Ah. Voila!"
"That's it!"

I have at last used my one year of high school French.


> -----Original Message-----
> From: [removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org
> [<A HREF="mailto:owner-fiction_l@maillist.nslsilus.org]On">mailto:owner-fiction_l@maillist.nslsilus.org]On</A> Behalf Of Pamela M
> Weinberg
> Sent: Monday, January 24, 2000 7:22 PM
> To: [removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org
> Subject: library humor
>
>
>
> For a national library week program I am planning, I would like to do
> something with library humor, i.e. the actual funny things that happen to
> you because you work at a library. I would love it if you think of funny
> incidents, stories, patrons, malaprops,etc. and send them to me. You know
> what I'm talking about - the stories you come home and tell your family or
> the ones to regale your friends with. I'll also take poignant or
> endearing (especially good for children's experiences) stories that you as
> a staff member have experienced. I have some books and will get things
> from journals, but I need first-hand funny stories.
>
> I can't promise that I can put these on fictionL, but I might have hand-
> outs from the program that I could send if you give me your names. I'm
> really anxious to hear from you.
>
> Thanks -
>
> Pam Weinberg
> Oriole Park Br
> Chicago Public Library
>
>
>
>
>
> xx
> x~x
> `
>

FROM: "Kaite Mediatore" <[removed]@yahoo.com>
REC'D: 1/31/00, 9:26 AM

Okay, I found my list of "odd patron encounters." I've
been keeping one for about a year now. I don't write
down names, just weird questions, peculiar behavior,
bizarre information, that sort of thing.

Has anyone ever encountered this one? A patron came
into the library with a small plastic trash bag. She
walked up to the reference desk and asked for books on
animals. After a little reference interview, it was
determined that what the patron really wanted was to
identify the remains of the animal in the plastic bag!
My colleague took a peak in the bag and absolutely
identified as a "rodent" either a rat or squirrel. The
patron looks in the bag and says, "You think so? I
kinda thought it was a dinosaur. Where are the
dinosaur books?" And my colleague politely showed the
patron where the dinosaur books were in the stacks.
Whereupon she plopped the bag and herself in the
middle of the aisle to do her research.

Now, I know some people may find this kind of gross.
But my colleague and I just had to laugh over the
kinds of things librarians are asked. And he handled
it all with thoughtfulness and respect. My hat was off
to him, I'd have lost it once the patron opened the
bag! My lunch, I mean.

Kaite


__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
Talk to your friends online with Yahoo! Messenger.
<A HREF="http://im.yahoo.com">http://im.yahoo.com</A>

FROM: "Ng, Janet" <[removed]@QueensLibrary.org>
REC'D: 1/31/00, 11:46 AM

All these stories on library humor are making me laughing. Maybe
we should write a book on it. This is my favorite humor. This
past summer I was in charge of the Young Adult Summer Reading Club.
I had weekly meetings. One of them was a special event where they
were game activities and they could win prizes. I made flyers
indicated the event, the place, time and that it was for only
members of the young adult summer reading club. One high student
came over and asked me about. He said that he wanted to join the
summer reading club in order to participate in game day. I told
him what the summer reading club was. He asked me that he had to
read books. I was shocked.
Janet Ng
[removed]@queenslibrary.org

FROM: "Roberta S. Johnson" <[removed]@nslsilus.ORG>
REC'D: 1/31/00, 12:59 PM

> Has anyone ever encountered this one? A patron came
> into the library with a small plastic trash bag. She
> walked up to the reference desk and asked for books on
> animals.

I watched this happen at the tiny public libray in Indian Lake, NY. A middle-aged man
came in and asked for books on moles or shrews, hoping to identify a little animal he'd
turned up in his field, and the librarian politely asked what the animal looked like. He
whipped out a little box and offered her the tiny corpse. She gave the tiniest yip but
recovered beautifully. This was just when I was considering library school, and I
thought, "Now *that's* reference service!"

Roberta


Roberta S. Johnson
Adult Services Librarian
Des Plaines Public Library
[removed]@nslsilus.org
www.fictional.org
Opinions my own.

FROM: "Ng, Janet" <[removed]@QueensLibrary.org>
REC'D: 1/31/00, 1:08 PM

I forgot to ask. As soon as you are done with compling the list
of stories on Library Humor could you send a copy to me through
e-mail. I would appreciate it.
Janet Ng
[removed]@queenslibrary.org

FROM: "Fiction_L" <[removed]@nslsilus.ORG>
REC'D: 1/31/00, 3:22 PM

One day while working the circulation desk at our small public library,
three young girls were wondering around our juvenile non-fiction section.
One got up enough courage to ask me if we had any books on the subject of
purgatory--they were studying it in school. My first reaction was
confusion, these three girls attended a public school and I could't beleive
they would be teaching about purgatory in a public school. Then it hit me.
"Oh you mean puberty--sure we have a couple of good books for you!" Those
of you who are of the female persuasion may feel its one and the same!

Michelle Gobert, Director
Edward U. DEmmer Memorial Library
Three Lakes, WI

-----Original Message-----
From: [removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org
[<A HREF="mailto:owner-fiction_l@maillist.nslsilus.org]On">mailto:owner-fiction_l@maillist.nslsilus.org]On</A> Behalf Of M. Shields
Sent: Thursday, January 27, 2000 11:04 AM
To: [removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org
Subject: Re: library humor


Mary Clemens wrote:

> A lot of our library humor has come from misunderstanding
> what a patron is asking for oftentimes because of an accent
> or unclear enunciation.
>

Very true! Once I had a patron ask if we had "physical rapport." Since he
was
on
the tall-dark-and-handsome side, I was nothing loathe to explore this
question
in
depth. It turned out, however, that he wanted to know whether we had fiscal
reports. :-)
(Red face.)

Another time a youngish patron, chewing a wad of gum that would choke a
camel,
asked for material on "syllogism." Somewhat perplexed but impressed, I
started
looking up
"sy- ." I noticed an odd look on the patron's face (i.e., "what is she,
stupid?) and did
what I should have done initially: ask questions. It took a couple of more
minutes, and a
request that he take the gum out of his mouth, to determine that he wanted
books
about
Shirley Chisholm.

FROM: "Fiction_L" <[removed]@nslsilus.ORG>
REC'D: 1/31/00, 3:23 PM

Once when I worked the circulation desk, a patron came up to the counter to
check out several books but the computer blocked her. She wanted to know
why
so I explained that she had books out and all were overdue. She was very
surprised and said that she did not have any books out and wanted to know
what
they were. I brought up the list and all the titles had something to do
with
multiple personalities! The patron insisted that she did NOT check those
books out!

Sue Johnson
Charleston County Public Library
Charleston SC

FROM: "Jean Meadors" <[removed]@ccpl.ci.corpus-christi.tx.us>
REC'D: 1/31/00, 4:15 PM

Working in a library out in the country (sort of) on the edge of town
anyway, we always have "critters" come visit us. Usually things in the
snake, scorpion, lizard or rat variety. We haven't had any patrons bring
us dead animals, only live ones such as rats. Our regular visitors of the
snake variety come in all on their own. It sure makes for an interesting
day waiting to see who arrives first. The sheriff or the vector control
people. The things they never teach us in library school (like how to
catch a 7 foot rattlesnake).
anyway life is never dull, and you always look before you sit on the
floor.
Jean

On Mon, 31 Jan 2000, Roberta S. Johnson wrote:

>
> > Has anyone ever encountered this one? A patron came
> > into the library with a small plastic trash bag. She
> > walked up to the reference desk and asked for books on
> > animals.
>
> I watched this happen at the tiny public libray in Indian Lake, NY. A middle-aged man
> came in and asked for books on moles or shrews, hoping to identify a little animal he'd
> turned up in his field, and the librarian politely asked what the animal looked like. He
> whipped out a little box and offered her the tiny corpse. She gave the tiniest yip but
> recovered beautifully. This was just when I was considering library school, and I
> thought, "Now *that's* reference service!"
>
> Roberta
>
>
> Roberta S. Johnson
> Adult Services Librarian
> Des Plaines Public Library
> [removed]@nslsilus.org
> www.fictional.org
> Opinions my own.
>

FROM: "Karen A.K. Keller" <[removed]@tln.lib.mi.us>
REC'D: 2/1/00, 8:34 AM

Maybe we should have a humor list of the humor list...

On Mon, 31 Jan 2000, Ng, Janet wrote:

> All these stories on library humor are making me laughing.
>

> One high student came over and asked me about. He said that he wanted
> to join the summer reading club in order to participate in game day. I
> told him what the summer reading club was. He asked me that he had to
> read books. I was shocked.
>
Guess, if he was "high" it might not have been such a shocking question?!
Sorry, don't mean to poke fun cuz I know sometimes my fingers move faster
at the keyboard than my brain but I'm enjoying this thread twice!


Karen Keller
Brighton (MI) District Library

FROM: "Karen A.K. Keller" <[removed]@tln.lib.mi.us>
REC'D: 2/1/00, 8:37 AM

Tell me to shut up if I'm being obnoxious but I'm enjoying the double
sided recounting of these humorous stories...

On Mon, 31 Jan 2000, Fiction_L wrote:

> three young girls were wondering around our juvenile non-fiction section.
> One got up enough courage to ask me if we had any books on the subject of
> purgatory--they were studying it in school. My first reaction was
>
"Wondering" seems to be particularly apt with a subject like purgatory.


Karen Keller
Brighton (MI) District Library

FROM: "Fiction_L" <[removed]@nslsilus.ORG>
REC'D: 2/1/00, 11:31 AM

you mean they are not the same!!!!!

>>> "Fiction_L" <[removed]@nslsilus.ORG> 01/31/00 03:26PM >>>
One day while working the circulation desk at our small public library,
three young girls were wondering around our juvenile non-fiction section.
One got up enough courage to ask me if we had any books on the subject of
purgatory--they were studying it in school. My first reaction was
confusion, these three girls attended a public school and I could't beleive
they would be teaching about purgatory in a public school. Then it hit me.
"Oh you mean puberty--sure we have a couple of good books for you!" Those
of you who are of the female persuasion may feel its one and the same!

Michelle Gobert, Director
Edward U. DEmmer Memorial Library
Three Lakes, WI

-----Original Message-----
From: [removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org
[<A HREF="mailto:owner-fiction_l@maillist.nslsilus.org]On">mailto:owner-fiction_l@maillist.nslsilus.org]On</A> Behalf Of M. Shields
Sent: Thursday, January 27, 2000 11:04 AM
To: [removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org
Subject: Re: library humor


Mary Clemens wrote:

> A lot of our library humor has come from misunderstanding
> what a patron is asking for oftentimes because of an accent
> or unclear enunciation.
>

Very true! Once I had a patron ask if we had "physical rapport." Since he
was
on
the tall-dark-and-handsome side, I was nothing loathe to explore this
question
in
depth. It turned out, however, that he wanted to know whether we had fiscal
reports. :-)
(Red face.)

Another time a youngish patron, chewing a wad of gum that would choke a
camel,
asked for material on "syllogism." Somewhat perplexed but impressed, I
started
looking up
"sy- ." I noticed an odd look on the patron's face (i.e., "what is she,
stupid?) and did
what I should have done initially: ask questions. It took a couple of more
minutes, and a
request that he take the gum out of his mouth, to determine that he wanted
books
about
Shirley Chisholm.

FROM: "Ellen Reynolds (PLS-HQ)" <[removed]@pls-net.org>
REC'D: 2/2/00, 8:44 AM

I was calling reserves one evening. When the person answered the phone
I said, not thinking but using my usual phrase, "Hello, this is the
library. We have An Indecent Obsession (Colleen McMcCullough, 1981)for
you." Fortunately the patron was one I knew well and we both laughed.
--
Ellen J. Reynolds
Information Resources/Adult Services Coordinator
Pioneer Library System
4595 Rt. 21 N. Canandaigua NY 14424
716-394-8260
[removed]@pls-net.org

FROM: "Tahtinens" <[removed]@bytehead.com>
REC'D: 2/2/00, 5:32 PM

FROM: "Wendy Street" <[removed]@server.silo.lib.ia.us>
REC'D: 2/4/00, 2:21 PM

If it's not too late to add to this thread ...

We had a confused patron who wanted the latest title in "Whoopi's Book
Club"

Another patron wanted to place a reserve on "those books by Larry
Potter--I'm not very familiar with them." Obviously.

My all-time favorite was the patron who had heard on the radio about a
book she was sure was called "Dr. Seuss in Love's best book" which was
supposed to have great illustrations. It turned out she had heard about
"Dr. Susan Love's Breast Book" (it was well illustrated, but not by Dr.
Seuss!)

Wendy Street
Urbandale Public Library

FROM: "Pam Scott" <[removed]@omaha.lib.ne.us>
REC'D: 2/4/00, 3:41 PM

I can't hold back any longer! These came to coworkers:
1. What year did the spaniel Amanada invade England?
2. I need a copy of that wedding music - you know, the Taco Bell Cannon in
D.
3. I need information on the pullover tree. (Luckily, her daughters went
to school in Arizona and she'd seen a Palo Verde tree - very rare here in
Nebraska)

FROM: "Jeanne Linn" <[removed]@libby.org>
REC'D: 2/4/00, 3:53 PM

Late or not these were too funny to miss! Thanks! Jeanne

-----Original Message-----
From: Wendy Street <[removed]@server.silo.lib.ia.us>
To: [removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org <[removed]@maillist.nslsilus.org>
Date: Friday, February 04, 2000 2:53 PM
Subject: Library humor


>If it's not too late to add to this thread ...
>
>We had a confused patron who wanted the latest title in "Whoopi's Book
>Club"
>
>Another patron wanted to place a reserve on "those books by Larry
>Potter--I'm not very familiar with them." Obviously.
>
>My all-time favorite was the patron who had heard on the radio about a
>book she was sure was called "Dr. Seuss in Love's best book" which was
>supposed to have great illustrations. It turned out she had heard about
>"Dr. Susan Love's Breast Book" (it was well illustrated, but not by Dr.
>Seuss!)
>
>Wendy Street
>Urbandale Public Library
>
>

FROM: "Patty Ayala" <[removed]@timberland.lib.wa.us>
REC'D: 2/5/00, 10:43 AM

Just yesterday....

"I need a biography of Louisiana Purchase. I have looked in the
encyclopedia under Purchase, and he isn't in there!"

------------------------------------------------------------------------
Patty Ayala
Reference Librarian II

Centralia Timberland Library Voice: 360-736-0183
110 S. Silver FAX: 360-736-2714
Centralia, WA 98531-4296 e-mail: [removed]@timberland.lib.wa.us
------------------------------------------------------------------------

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